+JMJ+ Though this was originally written a few years ago, I’m including it as a re-share in our current Catholic Christianity 101 or What is Christianity series. No other Holy Thursday has affected me as deeply as that first one just two nights before I was to be received into the Church at the Easter Vigil. And so I will share with you again, and for those who have not read it, for the first time, my account, lightly edited, of that evening.

After the Holy Thursday liturgy a few people stayed in the pews to watch with Him. Fr. — had stripped the altar, had set up the tabernacle, palm fronds around it in the dimly lit, darkened nave. Hushed voices became softer and softer until they fell silent as most of the last stragglers left, leaving just three of us there.

In the tabernacle the Lord was preparing to face the ordeal of ordeals. In the pews were His three disciples, fighting to stay awake, nodding off, not understanding what was taking place then, having no idea what would be taking place in a matter of hours. 

I couldn’t sleep. I wanted to take in everything, everything I saw or heard or felt. I wanted to hold onto it, to remember. I heard snores behind me and grew more determined to remain awake and to watch.

At nearly midnight, the priest entered the sanctuary with two altar servers, one on either side of him, holding long-handled candle lighters which, in the dimly lit darkness, looked exactly like spears. They’ve come to arrest Him! 

I watched, unable to stop them. I looked around to see if anyone else saw what I did, but they were sound asleep. I was alone, beholding the unfolding scene. 

The altar servers stood holding their spear-candlelighters while the priest stepped forward and bent down to open the tabernacle door and lifted the Lord from His place of repose. Then he walked slowly away, the two trailing behind with their spears. They left through the sacristy door. The tabernacle door was left open, exposing the emptiness within.

All was silent—except for the snores behind me. I wanted to turn and shake them awake. They arrested Him! They took Him away! Did you not see? Why didn’t you help me? Why didn’t we stop them, why didn’t we help Him? At least in the Gospel there was an uproar, a fight. At least, St. Peter fought, though His Master stopped him. Others ran away.

Ah, Satan, get behind me.
Christ was obedient even unto death,
and so we all must be.

I’ve been Catholic now for twenty-eight years and all I can say is thanks be to God! Praise to You, Lord, Jesus Christ! Help us to remain watchful, to become better, more trustworthy, joy-filled disciples as we continue to praise You. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us! Take this stony heart of mine and make my heart like unto Thine. Amen!

I leave you with this video from Dana and Fr. Scallon, the opening of their heartbreakingly beautiful meditation on the Stations of the Cross.

Thank you for visiting and reading. Have a blessed Holy Week. God bless you and may His peace be always with you. +JMJ+

Join me on Fridays for the Rosary Project Live on Twitter at 8pm ET, 7pm CT, to cultivate a culture of Light, Life, Love, Truth, Beauty, and Goodness, for the conversion of sinners, and for the salvation of souls. There’s also a Rosary on the blog you can use anytime.

“The Rosary is the ‘weapon’ for these times.” — Padre Pio

---

Notes and Links

• Original 2019 post.
• Re-posted in 2020.

Images: The Last Supper [and the Betrayal], by Carl Bloch, via Wikimedia Commons, public domain. Various details from the Agony in the Garden and the Arrest in the Garden, by Duccio di Buoninsegna, via Wikimedia Commons, public domain. Included in the altarpiece, The Maestà (1308-11), “commissioned by the Siena Cathedral in 1308 and it was completed in 1311.” Read more about the magnificent Maesta altarpiece at the Web Gallery of Art (more analysis), or on Wikipedia.

Subscribe via email: While you’re here, subscribe to get new blog posts, updates on projects like the ebooks, giveaways, and who knows what else. And thank you very much!

Full disclosure: When you make any purchase through my Amazon affiliate links (or my general Amazon link) on this site, I may make a small commission at no cost to you. Thank you. And thank you for your prayers and support.

Copyright: All original material on Catholic Heart and Mind is Copyright © 2009-2024 Lee Lancaster. All rights reserved. Read more.

Series Navigation
Annotated Table of Contents Catholic Christianity 101 Series
Annotated Table of Contents for all series.